Beautiful Chaos

So I am obviously starting this blog after Mila was born (she is 9 months now), but I wanted to attempt to shortly recap the past 9+ months.

My whole pregnancy I was pretty laid back, which suits me well. I really wanted to try to just enjoy the pregnancy, and to have it hopefully not seem like it was lasting forever. I just went about my life as I always did, just with a little extra something special growing in my belly :) I remained patient until that last month. That month took 10 years to come to an end. I was so ready to have my body back all to myself (joke was on me because then I nursed Mila, so my body was still 100% hers) and to finally see this little girl. My labor was great and fast considering she is my first child. Honestly, I felt like I did not have enough time to process what was happening, because before I knew it, Mila was laying on my chest. And from that second on, chaos ensued. I say chaos because the first couple months (okay, more like 4 months) are insane. Mila ate constantly, and was a terrible napper, probably because she was always hungry. I think the first two months I did not consistently sleep more than 2 hours, which is probably just like every other mom. I'm not complaining....I'm really not. Now I realize that these things are what makes me a mom. Giving up my entire being to nurture and raise another human regardless of how exhausted or hungry or, again, exhausted I may be. In those moments, at 3 a.m. when my baby was awake and hungry and I was so tired that all I could do is cry while I fed her, that's when I became a mom.

Eventually things got easier, and we figured out life as a team, Mila and I. Looking back at those incredibly hard times now, I realize that it was such a beautiful chaos. It was the best kind of crazy you could ever imagine. My baby girl was healthy and strong, and little did I know how much my life was growing in these times. Now as I watch her take her first steps, I can't believe how far we have come and how fast it has all happened.

   

About one month old in each photo. (I can't believe she was ever this tiny!!)